No Angel

"Captain!" B'Elanna's voice was slightly breathless as she jogged up the corridor. Kathryn turned back at the call.

"B'Elanna - I thought you were lost in preparations for the party?"

"I am, but I needed to ask you something - to ask you to come." Kathryn thought B'Elanna sounded as though she expected to have to cajole her into going to this ... what had Tom described it as? A hen night, that was it. She hadn't caught the rest of the conversation, but the tone of his voice suggested that it wasn't exactly a sober event.

Kathryn wavered for a moment, aware as always that her presence was likely to cast a slight shadow over the proceedings. B'Elanna, though, seemed to want her there. Perhaps - well, why not? She could always leave early if she seemed to be getting in the way of the others' enjoyment - and it would be amusing to see B'Elanna's shock at an immediate yes. It would also give her some ammunition next time Chakotay tried to claim she never attended crew events.

"Yes, I'll be there." She was right: it was amusing. B'Elanna appeared to be trying to hold back an immediate inclination to persuade her - then she broke into a grin.

"Great!" She laughed. "I was expecting a struggle to persuade you to come, Captain."

"I know," smiled Kathryn. "What time do I need to be there, and where will 'there' be?"

"2000 hours this evening, Captain, Holodeck 2. I've been told to tell everyone to dress smartly but comfortably."

"You've been told," echoed Kathryn. "I thought you were organising this?"

B'Elanna shook her head. "I started it - it was one of Tom's ideas and it sounded like fun, but the Delaney sisters took over the organising. They said it wasn't the bride's role to organise her own hen night. It should be interesting."

"May you live in interesting times ..." murmured Kathryn. B'Elanna looked at her, quizzically. "It's an ancient proverb. Some say it was a curse." Kathryn smiled. "It's rather appropriate for Voyager, don't you think?"

B'Elanna grinned again. "Too appropriate, sometimes, Captain. See you this evening," she said as she turned to head back the way she come from when she had seen the Captain. Kathryn shook her head, watched B'Elanna stride away quickly. Pent-up energy coursed through every step and, not for the first time, Kathryn wondered how Tom dealt with all of that. Then shook her head again, grinning, as she decided that he probably had some very good ways of dealing with it and all of them came under the heading of 'too much information'.

She continued down the corridor; alpha shift had just finished, and she had a couple of hours free before she needed to do anything about the 'smart but comfortable' change of clothes. Idle thoughts flitted through her mind as she relaxed from the Bridge duty she'd completed; the shift had been somewhat dull and the routine paperwork she'd caught up on really did nothing to stimulate. She'd barely restrained herself from yawning towards the end of the shift. Chakotay's eyes had become more heavily-lidded than usual, and she had suspected that he was running through tactical scenarios in an effort to stay awake.

A few more steps brought her to his cabin; the door yielded to her thumbprint and she slipped inside. A quiet insistent rhythm greeted her - music, probably something to do with Chakotay's tribe, she thought, playing with a haunting melody underpinned with a solid beat. Chakotay himself was sitting at his desk, intent on something on his terminal. The hiss of the door either hadn't registered, or he was finishing something up.

The casual wave of his hand, gesturing her towards the replicator, indicated the latter. Kathryn smiled at his absorption and crossed to call up another cup of coffee. Despite the Doctor's admonitions to the contrary, she thought she'd probably need all the caffeine she could get this evening. Tomorrow was soon enough to think about whether or not to listen to his seven-year-long lecture on the evils of caffeine.

"Everything alright with the ship?" Chakotay asked as Kathryn turned back from the replicator.

"Mmm," answered Kathryn absently, mentally cataloguing her wardrobe. "I'll be out this evening, B'Elanna's decided to have a hen night - or rather, been convinced that she needs to have one. I think the Delaney sisters have plans ..."

Chakotay laughed. "I though the hen night was supposed to come before the wedding?"

"Well, there wasn't exactly a lot of time before the wedding, was there?" Kathryn pointed out.

"True," he nodded. "So, what have they got planned?"

"I don't know - and with the Delaney sisters, I find it's better that way. The less I know about what they get up to, the less I worry about it. We've been out here long enough for the crew to know how to deal with them, so I just ... leave them to it." Kathryn grinned; the sisters were fun, just a little over-exuberant at times. Chakotay smiled at her amusement.

"I'm sure you'll tell me all about it later," he said, turning back to the terminal. "I just got to finish up some changes to the shift schedules, and then I'll be with you. Do you want to eat here or in the messhall?"

"Uhh ..." Kathryn checked her replicator rations. "In the messhall, I think," she said, "I'm running a little low on rations right now."

Chakotay nodded. "Ok - I don't want you running out of coffee. The crew's been through enough lately without dealing with a caffeine-deprived captain as well," he teased. Kathryn just poked her tongue out at him. Childish, but satisfying. He was right, though. Things had been quite stressful enough as it was.

For a moment, Kathryn wondered whether she could call B'Elanna and turn down the invitation. She hadn't had a night alone with Chakotay in too long; their relationship was still new - or, at least, this aspect of it was. She wanted the luxury of an evening with him, and this ... Oh well. She'd accepted, she would have to go.

Still, it would have been nice to stay - this 'settling-in' of their relationship seemed to be going well; fitting this new aspect of their relationship into the comfort of their existing relationship was ... interesting. It was an odd shift; they had been close for years - sometimes more so than others - closer than even she had been to Mark, or Justin, but without the dimension of intimacy. Somehow, that had been almost superfluous. But only almost, she quickly found out.

The joy of being able to physically express her emotions, the freedom to tell Chakotay that she loved him, was a gift that she cherished. Outwardly the relationship seemed almost not to have changed; they hadn't made a secret of it but neither had they broadcast it. The banter was still there, the flirting even on duty, and the sense of being able to anticipate the other - all the things that worked for the command relationship and formed their personal relationship - were now supported by a personal freedom.

Kathryn had occasionally wondered what their relationship would be like, in the midst of daydreams, but hadn't quite imagined this. A comfort, a relationship almost unchanged but more fully expressed. On the other hand, what else could it have been? She'd been in love with him for years, and he with her; all that it lacked was the acknowledgement. Neither of them was the type for hysterical outbursts of emotion, for the 'young new lovers' mutual self-absorption. Looking back, she'd treated him as her partner all the way along. She just hadn't allowed herself to think of him that way.

So, nothing really had changed. Except for sleeping arrangements, and a level of comfort with each other that was re-establishing itself more deeply. For the first week or so, they had been almost uncomfortably aware of each other, waiting to see what changed and how the relationship would move forwards. Rather tentative, trying to find their feet on new ground; but the ground hadn't changed - just the way they looked at it. Time smoothes out everything, though, and the first crisis had snapped them back into their accustomed roles at work. That, in turn, fed through into their off-duty time and Kathryn had found herself once again familiar with Chakotay; he hadn't suddenly changed, and neither had she.
Chakotay's touch brought her out of her musings. She looked up at him.

"Dinner?" he asked. She nodded.

"Just let me get changed first," she said, "I'll probably need to go straight to the holodeck afterwards.

"Ok, I'll wait out here for you."

Kathryn changed rapidly into black shirt and black trousers. Smart but comfortable; she added a pair of earrings with a dark red stone - nothing she could identify, she'd bought them on a shore leave a year or so ago. Delta Quadrant garnets seemed the best description. Low-heeled slip-on shoes, and she was set. She joined Chakotay and they headed down for dinner together.

Dinner passed in idle conversation - they ate one of Neelix's more palatable creations, although Kathryn still wasn't prepared to enquire too closely as to the ingredients. The conversation ranged from Jane Austen (which Chakotay had never read and Kathryn, on reflection, thought perhaps he ought to keep it that way. She couldn't quite see him enjoying Pride & Prejudice ...) to the latest crew gossip, via a promise by Kathryn to visit her spirit guide and an admission by Chakotay that he couldn't tell the Delaney sisters apart.

Still laughing, Kathryn left him just after 2000 hours to go to the holodeck. They parted at the turbolift with a kiss, Chakotay's mouth briefly covering her with the promise of more later.

Kathryn turned and headed for the holodeck, her fingers touched her slightly bruised lips. She shrugged to herself; she was off-duty, what did it matter?
When she reached the holodeck, she realised she need not have worried anyway. The lighting in the smoky small room she entered was so dim that she could have had a split lip bleeding and no-one would have been able to see.

B'Elanna spotted her entry and waved her over. "Captain, what are you having to drink?" she asked. Kathryn looked around the room; these people weren't all crew by any means. The Delaneys must have called up some holograms to fill out the space.

"Whiskey," she said as she reached B'Elanna. "I'll have whiskey - bourbon, if they've got it." B'Elanna laughed.

"It's synthehol, this is a holodeck, they have anything you want, Captain." Kathryn smiled.

"In that case," she said, "Maker's Mark - straight, no ice. And thanks." B'Elanna grinned and passed the order on to the beleaguered barman. He smiled wearily at Kathryn, obviously grateful that she hadn't asked for one of the outrageously named cocktails that were taking his colleague forever to concoct. Kathryn supposed that it added to the authenticity of the experience - manually constructing each drink, rather than simply calling it up - but it did make ordering slower.

The noise was deafening, and Kathryn decided to wait until she'd managed to get her drink before she tried to talk to B'Elanna. Eventually the barman located the bottle, tucked at the back of the bar, and poured a generous measure; Kathryn took it with some relief, then turned to see what all the shrieking was about.

She leant over to yell into B'Elanna's ear. "So, what is this place?"

B'Elanna turned her head to yell back. "It's a strip bar, it's the male revue night!" She looked at Kathryn, waiting for her reaction - Kathryn thought she seemed slightly anxious, presumably expecting her to decide to leave. Her crew did rather underestimate her at times. She just grinned, then smiled wider still at the look of relief that crossed her chief engineer's face. They moved away from the bar, heading by unspoken agreement for the corner furthest away from the speakers and the noise.

"Sounds ... interesting," Kathryn commented once they'd sat down at a table, taking seats on a curved plush purple sofa. "Do we have any idea what the talent is like?"

B'Elanna laughed. "Oh yes ... you just missed one of them. He came out here about five minutes ago, striding through here to hype up the mood, I think. Certainly worked with some people," she pointed in the general direction of a gaggle of ensigns and crewmen that Kathryn could barely identify in the gloom, "and actually, if he's a typical example, then this might be fun." Kathryn lifted an eyebrow. "Oh, full of himself, arrogant, body that's a work of art so we might as well appreciate it - wearing something with more cutouts than fabric and posturing like the biggest peacock you've ever seen!"

Kathryn laughed. "Oh good grief ... at least you say he's a work of art?" B'Elanna nodded. "Oh well, if the scenery works, why not?"

Privately, Kathryn was amused by her own reaction. If she'd been told that the evening's entertainment would centre around a male strip show, she was certain she would have refused to attend. Now she was here ... well, it couldn't be the synthehol, she hadn't had enough to make a difference. Perhaps she was mellowing in her old age - that brought her up with a wry grin; she and Chakotay might be among the oldest on the ship, but neither of them quite qualified for old age. Actually, she just felt relaxed; somewhere in the last month or so she'd lost the need to prove herself in every moment of every minute of the day. How much of that was Chakotay and how much was simply surviving voluntary assimilation was open to debate - and she had more interesting things to do than debate the issue.

They were being called in to the theatre. Kathryn looked round with a rising disbelief as they entered; the auditorium was small, already filled with the noise of a hundred over-excited women squealing and shouting to each other - and the Voyager crew were no better. The whole seating area was covered in a red velour that had long since seen better days - it was stained and scuffed, and Kathryn really didn't want to investigate what the stains might be. B'Elanna entered behind her and choked; Kathryn hoped it was with laughter.

"Oh my god - what is this place?" B'Elanna asked. Kathryn looked over her shoulder; she was laughing, thankfully.

The voice of one of the Delaneys floated over the babble. "It's a London strip club, we got the computer to find the details and recreate it for us - the whole evening is based on a standard ladies night out! Well, most of it." She giggled the last bit, and Kathryn wondered whether now was a good time to begin to be afraid.

The queue moved, and Kathryn headed for an aisle seat with B'Elanna following behind. She planned to sit towards the back, with B'Elanna between her and the rest of the group. That way, with any luck, they would forget she was there. She took another look over her shoulder; most of them had probably already forgotten, judging from the amount of synthehol they must have taken in. It would clear if necessary but, until that adrenaline jolt swept through the system, they were as oblivious as the holographic audience - unconcerned with her rank, even her presence, and more concerned with making decidedly lewd comments and predictions about the dancers.

They found seats, some way back from the stage. That wasn't saying much - the whole theatre was tiny and Kathryn estimated it took no more than 200 people. The stage in the centre was small, and allowed very little headroom - she wondered whether the dancers ever hit their heads on the lights ...

B'Elanna's voice distracted her. "Is this ... are you ..."

"I'm fine, B'Elanna, I'm not about to go dashing out of here right now. Unless you'd rather that I did?"

"No, not at all, Captain," B'Elanna relaxed. "It's just a little different to what I had imagined."

Kathryn wondered how Tom had described the party to her; his descriptions tended to be a little wild at the best of times. It was rare that reality overshot him. "How did the stag night go?" she asked. "Chakotay didn't have much to say about it - and it didn't sound as though he was covering anything up, either."

B'Elanna laughed. "It sounded boring - they sat around playing cards and drinking apparently. From what Harry said, they were too scared of my reaction to do anything worse." B'Elanna laughed again, and Kathryn grinned at the note of delighted evil.

Further down the row, the rest of the Voyager attendees were settling down - calling across the seats to each other, grinning and giggling with the rest of the audience. Kathryn spotted Seven at the other end of the row, and turned to B'Elanna. Hoping to conceal her astonishment she just asked "How on earth did you get Seven to attend?"

B'Elanna laughed. "I told her it would be a good opportunity to learn more about humanity!" She looked down the row. "I hadn't quite expected Sam Wildman to be quite that bad an influence on her though. She may learn more about humanity than I expected." Kathryn grinned - as much as B'Elanna's amusement as at Seven's expression of intrigued distain.
Just then, the music started. Conversation died down. It had to - there was no way anyone could speak over the volume of the music; it had a thudding beat that immediately gave it away as late twentieth-century rock and was badly distorted by the sound reproduction system. Kathryn inwardly groaned and wondered why everyone felt they had to aim for authenticity at all costs. If she was going to be deaf by the end of the night, she'd rather not suffer the howls of feedback as well.

The lights went down with the music; the stage alone was lit now, with a flood of spotlights in an array of colours that reminded Kathryn of Neelix's clothing. Finally, hips swaying to the music, a woman strolled onto the stage and began to run through a line of patter to bring the audience to a stomping, cheering mass calling for the first of the men to come on. Kathryn blinked, then realised that the over-made-up MC, with platinum hair stacked so high that it was in danger from the lights, was actually a man in woman's clothing. An odd spectacle - the few transvestites she'd known on Earth generally took far greater care over their appearance. Perhaps it was all part of the 'authentic' experience.

The audience's enthusiasm was eventually rewarded - the first of the dancers came on stage; the music volume rose again with the unsubtle beat reverberating in the small room as the boy began his routine. Kathryn refused to consider him anything other than a boy; she had a suspicion, which she tried hard to suppress, that she was old enough to be his mother. It was hard to take the routine seriously, and she found herself taking more of an interest in the audience than in the over-muscled specimen on the stage.

The reactions in the audience were an amusing mixture of outright enthusiasm and delighted scandal. The less-inhibited were simply yelling and shouting approval and encouragement, finally screaming with delight when the dancer's g-string came off. Others half-hid their faces but made sure they could see between their fingers. As the routines wore on, fewer and fewer bothered to even try to simulate scandalised looks. The MC came on to introduce each dancer, between sets, and Kathryn was certain she hadn't heard such an appalling set of puns and bad jokes since Tom's last stint as a comedian on Talent Night.

Kathryn supposed the dancers were all proficient enough; they were just all desperately young and trying far too hard. She looked at them relatively critically, admittedly, trying to see whether any of them would do as a model the next time da Vinci wanted her to try her hand at a male nude. She would rather paint Chakotay, but that might take too long ...
Next to her, B'Elanna was getting into the rhythm of the crowd, shouting and yelling with each item of removed clothing and each bump and grind of the routine. Kathryn just grinned. The most amusing moment came with a young man that Kathryn instinctively warmed to when he had the self-confidence to strip to a music track apparently entitled "That Don't Impress Me Much". His routine was slightly less polished than the others, and Kathryn assumed he was supposed to be a novice at this - either way, it was actually slightly more erotic than the over-produced performances of the previous dancers. The final part of his routine just had her doubled with laughter, as the dancer simulated taking a shower - pouring water over himself - and used his half-hard erection with a series of pelvic thrusts to divert the water to the first row of the audience.

Kathryn wiped the tears from her eyes, and noticed B'Elanna doing the same. That simply set them off, laughing again. The music lowered now, and the audience froze. Literally. She and B'Elanna stopped laughing and straightened up. One of the Delaney sisters was making her way down to the stage, and Kathryn wondered whether she should be afraid.

"B'Elanna," came Jenny's voice from the stage, "this next one is for you. We thought we'd let you know what you're missing, now that you've restricted yourself to just one of the men on Voyager. We had the computer make up a stripper, taking elements from each of the guys except Tom - the computer made the decision as to what was the best example of each ... part ... and created this for you; the perfect Voyager man. I just want to say that we haven't had time to see this yet, so I haven't got a clue what it's going to look like. But it's for you, anyway. Have fun!"

Kathryn suspected that the Delaneys had quite deliberately not looked at the creation, just to give themselves an excuse if it looked too peculiar for words. Or too familiar. She watched Jenny scamper back to her seat as the music came up again, and the audience became animated again as the program resumed.

The music was somewhat more complex now; still a driving beat, but not so loud that you couldn't hear yourself think, and some guitar sections that had Kathryn interested enough to remind herself to get the details from the computer later.

Then the last dancer - announced by the MC as 'Voyager' - came out and Kathryn was pretty sure she wouldn't remember anything about the music later.

He stood still in the centre of the stage, dressed in a StarFleet uniform. Legs slightly apart, hands held flat against his thighs. The audience went wild for a moment, then wilder still when the rest of Kathryn's row got over the surprise and yelled approval.

He was tall, slightly tanned - not as much as Chakotay, noted Kathryn - with dark tousled hair. She heard someone exclaim that he had Harry's mouth; she wasn't quite sure about that - it looked more like Chakotay's to her. In fact, the whole dancer looked suspiciously like Chakotay to her. Next to her, B'Elanna was laughing again, trying to identify who the computer had used, and where. She seemed convinced that some of it was Tom, despite Jenny's announcement. Listening and watching, Kathryn thought perhaps she was indulging in wishful thinking. Or maybe it was just that the creation was one that made every woman think he looked like her lover.

The dancer began to move - not yet dancing, simply beginning to strip. One hand raised to unseal the jacket - finger dragging down slowly the seal at the front - then shrugged the jacket off his shoulders to fall behind him. A pulse later and the shirt came off, slowly pulled up over an enviably muscular stomach and gorgeously defined chest. Kathryn was transfixed - no dancing to distract, just a sure and steady stripping that was immeasurably more erotic. The audience seemed to agree, all watching steadily with an absorbed fascination and none of the incoherent screaming that had accompanied the earlier dancers.

He was naked to the waist now, and Kathryn finally realised why he seemed like Chakotay to her. It was the way he held himself; a steady confidence that wasn't quite arrogance. A broad, smooth, tanned chest didn't hurt the resemblance either, she thought.

He toed off the boots that he wore, kicking them to one side. All the while he held the gaze of the audience, looking from one side to the other, drawing them in with his eyes. His hands went the waistband of the trousers, and Kathryn was sure everyone was holding their breath.

They weren't disappointed. The seal parted with a slow run of his finger down the front - and more than one person in the audience moaned softly. The trousers fell to the stage, and were kicked away with the rest.

Kathryn shivered, surprised at her own arousal; the dancer was naked now - no g-strings or other toys to tease. Just a man. An understatement, certainly, but he was just a man when all was told. An aroused man at that; as with all the other dancers, erect enough to be interesting to look at without being so hard that it was pornographic. At least, that was what Kathryn imagined was supposed to be the case. She shivered again, and started to make some sense out of what it was that made Chakotay so attractive to her. The confidence, the sense of purpose. She'd occasionally wondered why she was so attracted to him, but hadn't really had the time to analyse it - or, to be honest, the inclination. She'd fought the attraction, then fought the emotions, and finally given in to both and now acknowledged to both of them that she was in love with him - and that she loved him. However, through none of that had she actually stopped to think why she was attracted, in love, loving. Here, though, she had a part of the answer reflected in her reaction to the hologram on the stage.

He stood still again, legs slightly apart, hands on his thighs, and watched the audience then - slowly, so slowly - began to move. The dance routine was almost abstract; none of the obvious thrusting and pushing of the previous routines, this was more closely choreographed. It seemed to Kathryn like a series of scenes, each ending with the dancer still for a few moments in a pose that was undeniably erotic. Each spiked her arousal a little further; in her imagination she substituted this 'body of Voyager' with Chakotay and she could feel a pull within her that grew warmer and tauter with each sinuous expression in dance.

Finally it was over and Kathryn could breathe; the dancer stood again in the centre of the stage, almost as he'd started, legs slightly apart. This time, though, one hand was on his thigh. The other simply rested on his erection, fingers lightly curled around it. A moment, a held breath, and then the lights went out.

Kathryn exhaled, trying to release the tension curled inside her and knowing that it wouldn't release so easily.

The lights came back up to an empty stage and a thunderous applause from the audience; B'Elanna stood with Kathryn; she looked rather distracted, and Kathryn smiled. B'Elanna noticed and smiled back somewhat self-consciously. "I think I'll go and find Tom," she muttered. Kathryn's smile widened.

"Mmm. I can understand that. I'm planning on finding Chakotay," she said. B'Elanna's eyes widened, and Kathryn almost laughed. She could understand the surprise - neither she nor Chakotay generally flaunted the relationship, and this was probably the first time she'd said anything that underlined it.

B'Elanna recovered quickly, though, and grinned. "Good move, Captain."

They left the holodeck together, walking quickly, with a few other people clearly intent on the same sort of destination. B'Elanna headed off towards the messhall, muttering something about a card game that she thought Tom was involved in.

"Computer, where is Commander Chakotay?" Kathryn asked, a little breathless as she strode down the corridor towards the turbolift; she didn't bother to check whether anyone had followed her this way and could overhear. If they hadn't worked it out by now, they weren't as astute as she'd thought.

"Commander Chakotay is in the Captain's quarters," came the calm monotone of the computer. Kathryn smiled; when they got back to the Alpha Quadrant, she would have to have a word with whoever determined the protocol for computer responses - it was odd to hear herself referred to in the third person that way.

She reached the turbolift and waited impatiently for the summons to be answered; she shifted from one foot to another and then reminded herself not to repeat that movement - it was a little too incendiary, and she had other plans for the sensations coursing through her. She wondered for a moment what Chakotay had done this evening; he hadn't had any plans when she'd left. Right now, though, she was more interested in how he was going to spend the rest of the evening.

The turbolift arrived and she entered, snapping out a request for the halt nearest her quarters. Was Chakotay waiting for her? They had spent most nights together since she returned from the Borg cube; often only sleeping with the exhaustion of long days and shipboard crises but, still, the connection was there. Kathryn debated whether to ask the computer if Chakotay was asleep but, then again, she'd learn that soon enough. The doors slid open and she made her way to the door of her quarters; the slip of fabric against skin was more pronounced than she had known it before and she shivered a little as she entered the code to open the door. Her fingers fumbled for a moment, then the door opened with the usual whisper.

The lights were low, but the room wasn't dark. Chakotay hadn't gone to bed; he sat on the couch now looking up at her, but he'd clearly been reading. A book lay in his lap, still held loosely between his fingers. He smiled.

"Had a good time?" he asked. Kathryn smiled back, just catching her lower lip between her teeth. The arousal that the hologram had worked up redoubled as she looked at him, and she shivered again. Chakotay leaned forward just a little at the sight of her, and Kathryn suspected that she looked as aroused as she felt. He did nothing to stem that arousal, lounging on the couch in a white shirt and tan trousers. His feet were bare, as always in their quarters. The shirt was undone just enough to tantalise, shadowing and revealing a broad tanned chest. Kathryn itched to unbutton the rest of the shirt, to run her hands over skin that she knew so well and ... still ... not well enough.

She moved then, towards the back of the couch. Chakotay's eyes followed her, the smile on his face widening a little as he leant back. Kathryn looked down at him now, her hands on the back of the couch. The fabric was a little rough to the touch, sensitising nerve endings that really didn't need any more encouragement. She could feel ... everything. She saw only Chakotay, though. Dark eyes, obsidian in the half-light of the room, and a mouth that had inspired fantasies for more than six years. A full lower lip - Kathryn bit hers again - that she wanted nothing more than to suck on.

Thought and action intertwine, and Kathryn took Chakotay's mouth with her own. An odd sensation - she'd leant over the back of the couch and was kissing him upside down. Dear god, but he tasted wonderful. A dark warm smoky taste, like whiskey on a cold night. She felt Chakotay's mouth open against hers, his tongue just teasing her lips. A soft sigh, and she opened her mouth to meet his. The sweet invasion of his tongue - again, a new sensation, sweeping into her mouth with a pressure in unaccustomed places. Kathryn hazily made a mental note to remember to try this more often; the unusual position made for such a contrast. Then memory was forgotten as she felt Chakotay's hand curl round the back of her head, holding her into the kiss. He ran his other hand along her side, reaching backwards, until he cupped her breast. For a moment, Kathryn's heart stopped, then restarted with a jolt as she moaned into the kiss. His long fingers measured the weight of her breast, his thumb stroking softly over her nipple and teasing it harder still.

Kathryn sucked at Chakotay's lower lip - too many fantasies to miss this one - tugging gently with her lips then grazing with her teeth. She was rewarded with a soft groan and the flexing of his fingers on her breast; an assault on the senses that had her reeling again. She centred herself, concentrating on him, on the moment and pushing the overpowering sensation of his hands on her to the corners of her mind just for the moment. She wanted this to last, needed to call on some willpower to make this more than a five minute explosion.

Bracing herself on one hand, on the back of the couch, she let her other hand wander downwards. She traced Chakotay's jaw, then ran her fingers down his neck. He was warm, the comforting heat of his body igniting her senses again. His shirt was soft, but the contrast to his skin made it seem almost scratchy; Kathryn flicked open the buttons as she pushed her hand downwards. One day she'd thank him for wearing clothes that were this easy to remove ...

She flared her fingers out across his stomach, rubbing and touching with an abandoned pleasure that Chakotay clearly liked. His tongue thrust into her mouth with each sweep of her fingers, and his hips pushed upwards a little in counterpoint. Kathryn smiled into the kiss, then realised she was doing the same thing. They were caught already in a quiet rhythm, bodies pulsing together.

Another soft groan from Chakotay as she dipped her hand further down, just teasing below the waistband of his trousers. Kathryn laughed softly, finally breaking the kiss with a soft punctuating touch of her lips to his. Chakotay lay sprawled before her. His eyes were closed, a soft smile on his face. His hands still cupped her neck and breast as she leant over him. The shirt was open now, to the waistband, pushed to the sides by her explorations and his skin glowed gold in the dusk of the room. Kathryn sucked in a swift breath, and Chakotay opened his eyes to look up at her.

"Like what you see?" he whispered, lazily.

"Mmmm. I'll think about it ..." teased Kathryn. Chakotay laughed and rolled over on the couch to face her. He winced, though, and stood up abruptly.

"Not a good idea" he murmured.

"Too much pressure?" enquired Kathryn, teasing again. She'd seen exactly what it was that had made contact with the edge of the couch. "Want me to kiss it better?" Good lord, where had that voice come from? Even Kathryn didn't recognise herself, the words echoing in a low undertone that clearly had an astonishing effect on Chakotay.

"Ohhh ..." he closed his eyes again, swaying slightly as he stood. Kathryn could almost see the images unfolding in his mind and, impulsively, decided to see what she could do to bring them to reality. It had been her idea after all.

She moved quickly round the couch, and almost gasped again at the friction of walking. She'd lost herself in Chakotay almost to the point of forgetting her own arousal. Or perhaps they'd just become one arousal - his and hers. The reminder of her own was a stimulation almost too far, with the touch of his mouth and hands still vivid in her memory.
Chakotay stood, fists clenched and eyes still closed, and Kathryn thought he was trying to regain some measure of control. Too late for that ... she knelt in front of him and made short work of the buttons on his trousers. Such old fashioned things, but so much more fun to open than the seal of a uniform, she thought.

Chakotay gasped now, eyes opening wide as he stared down.

"Kathryn," he groaned; then groaned again as she wrapped her hand around his erection. Their touching and kisses had brought him to a full arousal, hard and hot in the palm of her hand. She looked up again at him, holding his gaze, then leaned forwards to touch her tongue to the tip. Chakotay's mouth opened in a soundless inhalation.

"Oh god, Kathryn ..." Another groan, deeper now, as she opened her mouth and took him in. Kathryn smiled to herself; the power was intoxicating - a fundamental power so different to that she had outside these quarters. A power he gave her, and which she reciprocated in full. The give and take of love, measured out in heartbeats and moments like these.

He was hard, warm, and the skin moved like silk over steel as Kathryn sucked deeply on him. All sensation - a slight salt tang, the taste of his arousal, and the rapid pulse of a vein against her lower lip. His hands tangled in her hair, neither pushing or pulling, just touching her. Kathryn looked up again, to see Chakotay staring down at her, his eyes glittering with an arousal hotter than anything she'd seen in him before. His mouth was slightly open, his breath coming in short choppy pants, mixed with a soft moan of her name.

Kathryn felt him tense in her mouth, tightening as she held him, and pulled back to release him from her mouth with a final lick across the tip that had him shuddering hard. She pushed his trousers down around his feet before she stood again. Chakotay stepped out of them, and pushed them aside as Kathryn slid her hands up his body. She teased his nipples as she passed, enthralled as her fingertips brushed the hard nubs to a harder prominence.

Kathryn curled her hands over his shoulders, feeling the muscles shift under her palms, and pushed back the shirt. It floated to the floor, unnoticed, as Kathryn leant forwards to kiss Chakotay again, a quick teasing kiss, a touch of lips to lips. She meant to pull away, but his hand caught the back of her head and pulled her into a deeper kiss. Mouths open again, tongues mating and exploring. Kathryn moaned now, the touch and retreat of Chakotay's tongue in her mouth stoking the arousal she'd fought to hold back. She pulled away and took his hand in hers, leading him through to the bedroom. Traditional, but then again she wasn't in the mood for fast and furious on the table or the floor tonight. This was too delicious to rush.

A few paces brought them into the bedroom, and Kathryn brought Chakotay's hand to her mouth, kissing and suckling his fingers. There was something almost unbearably erotic about being fully dressed now that he was naked; the feel of her clothes brushing against her skin and the sight of him moving, muscles bunching and releasing in his legs, the slight sway of his erection, the scent of him ... Kathryn could feel herself sinking into the moment, into the sight and feel of Chakotay. The mirror in the corner only reinforced the sensation, throwing back to her the images of his skin and her clothes.

She arched slightly, moving restlessly as Chakotay dipped his thumb into her mouth again, his fingers splayed along her jaw and rubbing gently at the skin beneath her ear. His other hand was exploring her again, brushing over her breasts and stomach to tease her through the fabric of her trousers. Kathryn shifted slightly, hips pushing into his hands, as she rasped his thumb lightly with her teeth.

"I love you." Chakotay's voice was rough with arousal, firing hers again. Kathryn wondered how much more she could take before she came; and then wondered whether she could climax from his voice alone. Chakotay slipped his hand from her face and stood in front of her for a moment, just looking at her. Kathryn met his eyes, revelling in the promise there. Then, suddenly, she found herself in his embrace. Held closely - oh, so closely - with his head buried at the point where her neck met her shoulders, hot open-mouthed kisses dampening the skin and his heated breath flaring through her. Kathryn let her head drop back, eyes closed, absorbed in the feel of his mouth on her.

So absorbed that she barely felt him open her shirt, brushing it away from her shoulders to fall on the floor beside her bed. The touch of his mouth on her breast brought her back, heat twisting through her as he suckled on her. His mouth was open against her, and Kathryn couldn't tear her eyes away. Chakotay glanced up at her, and Kathryn moaned. She opened her mouth, but no words came. Instead, she licked her lower lip, her tongue flicking across leaving it damp. Chakotay's eyes darkened at the sight, and Kathryn bit gently on her lip, arching herself into his mouth.

"Ohhh ..." She wasn't particularly coherent, but Kathryn really couldn't care less. The tug of Chakotay's mouth on her breast was a sweet agony, the touch of his tongue to her nipple multiplying the sensation as he swirled it around the erect nub. Somewhere in the back of her mind she felt his hands busy at the fastening of her trousers, then the cool air of the room on her legs as he pulled them down.

Kathryn let out a soft cry at the touch of Chakotay's fingers on her; not only her trousers, he'd obviously taken her panties with them. His fingers, long and supple, eased between her legs. She shifted slightly, opening herself to his touch. The pad of his thumb brushed against her, rubbing slowly against the nub of nerves, as his fingers slid between her folds. Kathryn felt herself slick against him, and shuddered as his middle finger slid into her. He pushed up into her heat, spreading his hand against her as he pulsed his finger in and out of her. Kathryn's hips slowly moved against him, circling and pushing against the touch of him within her. Another finger joined the first, stretching her just a little more, adding more to the sensation.

A final hard suck on her breast, and Chakotay began to kiss his way down her body. Kathryn moaned again in anticipation, spreading her legs wider still as Chakotay knelt between them.

He smiled up at her, and Kathryn let everything she felt show in her face as she looked down; love, anticipation, arousal and the indefinable sense of perfection and peace that flowed through even this maelstrom of emotions. Chakotay inhaled sharply at the sight before burying his mouth against her. Kathryn cried out at the touch, the suck of his mouth on her clitoris in rhythm with the steady pulse of his fingers. Then, so suddenly she felt bereft, Chakotay pulled his fingers out and replaced them with his tongue, lapping at her and pushing into her. His hands held her bottom, pulling her into him and holding her steady. Kathryn squirmed against him, loving the sensation of his tongue and the wet heat of them both, frustrated at the lack of his touch inside her.

"Chakotay, please, oh please ..." she murmured incoherently, her voice rising a little as he sucked a little harder.

"Please what?" he asked, his mouth still busy on her and voice shooting through her. Kathryn forgot how to speak for a moment, the sensation of his voice vibrating against her almost too much, then let her head drop back.

"Please ..." she moaned.

"Please what?" he teased again. Kathryn looked down at the devilment in his eyes, and in a moment of clarity decided that teasing could be repaid ...

"Fuck me ..." she whispered hoarsely, injecting as much command tone as she could muster, and caught her lip between her teeth again. She was rewarded with a sharp jolt and the off-rhythm push of his mouth against her. She'd succeeded in shocking him, clearly.

Chakotay pulled away, panting hard as he stood. "Kathryn?" he asked, and she answered him with a kiss, her hands curling round his neck to pull his mouth down to hers. He tasted of her, his mouth and chin slick with her arousal, and Kathryn swept her tongue into his mouth as she crushed them together. The hard muscles of his chest rubbed against her breasts and his erection slid and pulsed against her stomach as she held them together for a moment's eternity.

"Kathryn?" he asked again as she broke the kiss, breathing hard. She smiled at his confusion, at the heat in his eyes that belied the question.

"Fuck me ..." she whispered again, this time holding his gaze and watching his pupils dilate again as she spoke. The response was immediate: Chakotay caught her up and laid her on the bed, settling over her, his erection a delicious weight between her legs; he slid into her without hesitation, stretching and filling. Kathryn moaned softly, her arms going around his back to pull him closer. Chakotay closed his eyes with a groan at the sound of her voice, and dropped his head to her shoulder. Kathryn nipped his ear, just grazing it with her teeth, and gasped as she felt Chakotay hardened further within her and suddenly thrust harder into her.

"Kathryn ..." Her name seemed pulled from him, his voice hoarse, and Kathryn realised with a hot pleasure that she'd pushed him into climax as he thrust hard into her once more; this time he stayed hard and deep within her, and she welcomed the heat and pressure of his orgasm within her.

They lay together for endless moments; Kathryn cradling the weight of him between her legs, and Chakotay's head still on her shoulder as he supported himself on his elbows over her. Kathryn ran her fingers through his hair, kissing his earlobe again and smiling at the shudders that ran through him - and her.

Finally, she felt him breath in deeply, then lift away from her. She ached a little at the loss of him within her as he lay beside her.

"Oh Kathryn - I haven't lost control like that in decades," he murmured. Kathryn just smiled.

"I ... it's flattering ... and I like to watch you," she admitted, kissing him slowly.

"As long as you're pleased." He smiled, and leant into the kiss. "You don't usually ask like that," he said eventually, his mouth still against hers and his voice low and thick. Kathryn delighted in the arousal her words still pulled in him.

"I know," she smiled. " I - I just wanted to see what effect it had on you."

Chakotay laughed. "A good one ... surprising but good," he said, running his hand along her side.

"Mmmm.' Kathryn stretched and arched, lazily bringing up a hand to play with her breast. "I thought you might like it. Just don't expect it often - I don't really have that sort of vocabulary."

Chakotay tore his gaze away from her hand; Kathryn smiled at the expression on his face and wondered whether he'd heard anything she said. She licked her lips again, feeling them suddenly dry at the arousal written across him. She shifted to under him, desperately wanting the sensation of his heat inside her. Chakotay was still running his hand along her side, and Kathryn decided to test a theory for a moment. He'd been distracted enough by the sight of her touching her breast, what would he do if ...

Chakotay sucked in a sharp breath and Kathryn felt him shudder against her as she swept her hand down across herself and between her legs; she eased her fingers there and pushed two into herself, all the while watching Chakotay's reaction.

"Kathryn," he moaned, then brought his hand down to join hers. "Kathryn, don't tease ... not unless you want this to be over now," he growled, using his hand to push hers against herself. Kathryn gasped at the touch, as he pushed her palm flat to rub against herself, then gasped again as she felt his hand against her thigh.

"Chakotay?" she asked.

"Two can play at that game," he replied, a smile on his face. Kathryn felt herself grow impossibly more aroused as she realised he was stroking himself against her. She shifted away a little, not allowing his hand to leave her, wanting to see him. Chakotay blushed a little, which she found incredibly endearing, as she looking down between them to see his hand wrapped around his renewed, half-hard, erection, pushing lazily into it.

She looked back up and met his mouth with her own. "Oh god," she murmured into the kiss, "what you do to me ..." Pulsing, wet, heat and a kiss that brought them together at last - Kathryn found herself pulled onto Chakotay as he lay back on the bed, never breaking the kiss and thrusting up against her. His erection was like a fire to her arousal, pushing against her stomach, hardening further against her. Kathryn moaned again, incoherently, at the touch and pushed herself up just enough to straddle Chakotay.

Again she bit her lip, concentrating on his face as she took him in her hand. Kathryn shifted until she touched herself with him, letting his erection rub slowly backwards and forwards along her folds, just touching her clitoris to spark through her and then back through the slick heat to slide into her. She watched Chakotay shudder, the sensation pushing him against her, and close his eyes in concentration.

She settled against him with a long sigh of aroused contentment. The thick length of him pushed into her, filling her again with a delicious tension. Chakotay was looking at her now, watching the emotions, the sensations, flicker through her. His hands were on her thighs, just resting as she began to move against him with a slow circling of her hips over his. Kathryn arched back, letting her hands rest on Chakotay's thighs to support her as she moved.

She felt one of his hands slip between her legs, his thumb brushing her clitoris and stroking back to where they were joined.

"Kathryn, do you have any idea how beautiful you are?" The question seemed pulled from deep within him, and she simply answered with a moan. Too much sensation to be able to speak, but she pulled herself forwards again, to rest her hands on his chest to hold herself up as he took over, thrusting up into her, thickening and hardening slowly with each thrust.

He was beautiful - not a word he'd necessarily appreciate but true nonetheless; his face warm and glistening slightly in the starlight of the room, mouth slightly open as he panted for control and air, his eyes glistening and hotter still. The muscles in his chest worked under her hands, as his hand stroked her higher still.

Kathryn tensed again, feeling her arousal pool and coil in the pit of her stomach. A low, heavy sensation that pulled and pulsed with the rhythm of Chakotay's thrusts into her, heightened by the changing pressure as he reached a full, hard, erection within her, and then exploded in a starburst behind her eyes; Kathryn pushed down hard against Chakotay, needing the full sensation of him within her as she climaxed around him. She threw her head back, and cried out his name with a choked scream as she felt him sit up against her and then his mouth on her breast - the final kick of sensation that pushed her into a moment's blackness.

Kathryn opened her eyes, shuddering with the aftershocks still coursing through her; the tug and pull of Chakotay's mouth on her breast guided her down and back into the moment.

"Thank you," she whispered, her voice gone for the moment. He lifted his head from her breast, leaving it with a last brush of the tongue to her nipple, as he met her mouth in a kiss. He was still hard within her, a glorious fullness that had her aching again. Chakotay's tongue met hers in the kiss again, touching and lapping, his lips moving over hers with a firm pressure.

"Round three ..." he said, smiling as he broke the kiss. Kathryn smiled back, then clung to him as he shifted her onto her back, rolling with her so as not to break the connection between them.

Kathryn wriggled slightly to get comfortable on the bed, her legs spread as wide as possible to let Chakotay sink deeply into her. He had other plans though, clearly, and caught her legs under her knees to raise them upwards as he settled fully into her again. Kathryn moaned quietly as the change in angle increased the pressure within her.

"You like that?" asked Chakotay as he began to thrust against her.

"Yes ..." she replied on a short breath, panting as he pushed harder and harder against her. "Harder ..." she whispered, "I want you inside me ... harder."

Chakotay groaned and pushed harder still, slowly but firmly thrusting inside her. He pulled out almost completely and Kathryn moaned a protest that was smothered by a gasp as he thrust hard all the way back in. Once, twice more and she was writhing against him again, arousal coiling back around the length of him inside her now.

"Oh ... please, please, please ..." An incoherent stream of words and pleas that Kathryn thought were hers; Chakotay's moans matched hers, rising sharply as she reached between them to rub at her clitoris. She could feel him tense and lengthen between them; this time she wanted to come with him, although the sight of her touching herself again seemed to send him higher, pushing harder and deeper still into her.

Two sharp thrusts, full and deep, an answering pressure from her fingers and Kathryn felt herself come apart again. This time, Chakotay came with her - a low groan, almost a growl, torn from him as she felt him spill heat within her. Another private starburst behind her eyes, and the irresistible pressure of his climax within her, and they climaxed together.

Kathryn came back into the present with the welcome pressure of Chakotay in her arms, his erection softening slowly within her and the warm flood of them both between her legs. She arched lazily against him, stretching out the tension of orgasm, and wrapped her arms around his back.

"I love you," she murmured.

"Love you too," came the throaty reply. Chakotay raised his head to meet her mouth in a soft, almost innocent kiss. Kathryn smiled at the idea that any of Chakotay's kisses could be innocent. But this ... this was sweet, and warm, and loving, and just what she needed.

"So," Chakotay cleared his throat, "what got into you this evening? Besides the obvious," he added hastily. "I loved it, don't get me wrong," he said, smiling as he shifted to her side, pulling Kathryn up against him so that she lay sprawled across him, one leg over his, and her arm across his chest. His arms wrapped around her, holding her close to him.

Kathryn pressed a kiss to his chest. "Oh, just ..." she let her voice trail off, wondering how much to tell him. "B'Elanna's hen night had some ... interesting ... entertainment. You just got the benefit, that's all - and I'm sure we can find some way to make it happen again," she said, drowsily.

Chakotay pulled the covers over them; Kathryn could feel herself falling asleep and briefly considered getting up to clean herself off. She couldn't be bothered - it wasn't that bad, and she was too warm and comfortable to move right now. She nestled into Chakotay's arms and fell asleep, lulled by the rise and fall of his breathing.

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